In which I get a tattoo.

Wednesday, the day after Dracula's, Nic and I got on a tram in Fitzroy and hiked down to St Kilda. It's a little beach town with lots of night life. We explored the town after dropping our stuff off at the hostel, seeing as we couldn't check in till around one thirty.


It's known for it's cake shops, and by God is there cake. Four shops, practically all next to each other, all selling nothing but cakes and coffees. One could certainly get fat in St Kilda. We had a mooch around some shops, and I bought my own portable wi-fi set. It's a bit crap, but I don't have to pay a stupid $4 an hour that the hostels charge. Seriously, that's a lot of money, and the time goes so quickly. This way, I can spend as much time as I like (as long as there's signal). I have had problems where I just can't connect, but apparently that could be down to confined spaces such as hostel rooms. 


Well we walked around, and soon discovered that there was a tattoo parlour nearby. We both wanted a tattoo, and decided to go take a look. Had a chat with the guy at the counter about prices and sizes, and then went to a park with my new wi-fi, and checked out designs.


After much debating, I decided on a funky gecko one, and Nic chose a blow-your-mind-awesome-socks phoenix one. For an hour and a quarter, I sat whilst a guy from Suffolk drew a gecko on my ankle/foot. It was incredibly painful, and I may have had two bouts of tears. It didn't help that the guy joked at times, but looked incredibly serious when joking. For example, when I asked 'are we nearly done yet?' when I could clearly see that he had nearly finished inking it. When he replied in the stoniest voice "Nope, I have to go over it again after I've done this", I started crying. His colleague noticed, and said 'No, no, he's just joking!' and gave me some chocolate. Win.
The guy afterwards said that he had inked wussier people than me, but there weren't too many. Still, I'm happy with how I handled it. I'm a silent crier, so I just made faces and occasionally went 'Ow, ow ow'. But other than that, I was cool. Here are some finished photos - one gecko, two gecko, three gecko, four.
It turns out that I swear more when I'm in the car and on rollercoasters than when I'm having a gazillion needles stabbed into my foot. Weird, huh.


Nic had hers done too, and it turned out fantastic. It is, quite honestly, one of the best tattoos I have ever seen. They did an amazing job with it. We're both immensely happy with our tats. I'm chuffed with mine, because it symbolizes what an amazing journey I'm on at this point in my life. I'm a happy bunny :)


On the way back to the hostel, we stopped at McDonalds and had a satisfying dinner, and then had a well-deserved Cold Rock. Bought some Glad Wrap (cling film to you and I) and some sellotape, and have been taking care of it ever since :) It's a beautiful thing.


All of the girls, apart from one, in our dorm were English, and super-friendly. The most friendly backpackers we had shared a room with. A lot of them had met on their travels and they just stuck together, which gives me hope for my future hostel stays. Tatiana was from Canada, and I think Nic was in love with her accent. It was quite cool, but we must not forget that Canada spewed out Justin Beiber. Their credibility has gone down somewhat.
One of the girls that day managed to get a job in a call centre. She had a script to read, but sounded terribly rehearsed when she did it. I wouldn't mind doing it because it'd be a source of income, but what would put me off would be the grouchy people that immediately hang up or get pissy with you. There has to be more glamorous jobs...
Well, there are :) Tatiana has a job at the Spaghetti bar, and one other has a job as a head chef in a cafe :) There is hope for me yet.


That night we went for a stroll. Past all of the cafe's and bars, and down towards the beach. There's a great big parkland with a few playgrounds and huge grassy areas next to the beach, and we happily took a walk through the park. We had some music going on loudspeaker, and I ended up dancing and to everything that came on. It was a lot of fun - wandering though a big park in the dark, no one in sight, singing me little heart out. You don't need alcohol to have a good time.


So, Thursday Nic and I just wondered around St Kilda, stopping every few metres to check our tattoos. We had to stay out of the sun as much as we could, because it is an open wound after it's just been done, and is incredibly sensitive - a.k.a easily sunburnt. And needs to heal slow-like. So we stuck to the shade, and then took a walk down the pier at St Kilda. 


The pier is very beautiful - a decorative cafe at the bottom, and behind it is a path to some wild penguins that live in some rocks. It stands over blue ocean and little rock pools, and fishermen gather to try and get a fish or two.


Nic and I strolled up, and a fisherman cast his line. I saw it out of my peripheral vision, and was like Heh, in a movie that'd go through my leg or something.
Well, it didn't go through my leg, but another two centimetres lower and it would have pierced my thigh. Luckily, the hook got snagged on my shorts instead. I just kind of stood stock-still for a while, and then this Chinese fisherguy (or some Asian fisherguy) came running up to me spewing apologies left right and centre.
In a sort of stunned-haze I didn't make a fuss. Said something along the lines of "Looks like I'm the catch of the day!" and just watched as he struggled to unhook me from the metal.


In hindsight, I hope his bloody line snapped.


Well we walked up to see the penguins, but only got a glimpse of two that were hiding away. We then walked back down the pier to escape the sunlight, but got cornered by an old guy in a wheel chair. He started going on about how girl backpackers always lay on the beach or the grass to get a sun-tan, but have their legs open. 
Well yes, that is generally how one lays when sunning. Knees up, legs bent.
This guy then went on about how all of the sex offenders of Victoria (the state that Melly is in) come to St Kilda to photograph the unsuspecting backpackers, and how he had made it his personal mission to alert all young ladies of these nefarious fellows.
And also, to Stay away from Pervert Park! That's where they getcha. They wait for girls to go into the loo, and then pounce on 'em and rape 'em cause they're not quick enough to pull their pants up.
I mean, this guy is like seventy-odd. Claims he can't read or write (but I don't believe that for a second), and was preaching on about how the police force are shoddy and do most of the raping and stuff, and get away with it because of their position.


I wasn't very comfortable listening to this guy. I mean, which ever beach you go to in a world, someone somewhere will have a camera. It's just the way it is - it's part of the beach package. I wasn't going to let some jaded old man put me off sunbathing. It was a disturbing encounter.


Well, we went into the town, to Acland Street. We went to one of St Kilda's famous cake shops, and I got a slice of choccy cake and Nic got a slice of apple pie. I had so much trouble finishing it because it was so darn rich. But finish it I did, and enjoy it I did even more. Choco cake is good cake.


We headed back to the hostel and just chilled for the rest of the day. Played a lot of Uno, and learnt the first few notes of My Little Pony on the ukulele. Nic also taught me the well-known notes of Smoke on the Water, which should please my dad immensely. The uke will be fun to learn, I feel.


Nic left on Friday morning to go back to Brisbane, and I was to meet my cousin Wendy and go stay with her. She got on an airport-shuttle bus at 10 past 10, and we said a sweet goodbye. I wasn't meeting Wendy till 5, so had quite a lot of time to kill. I went back to the tattoo shop to ask a few questions, and then grabbed a few mochas at a cafe. Had a nice chat with Malice on Skype as a catch-up, and then meandered down to the park where Nic and I had walked two days previous, and had a bit of a sunbathe whilst reading a book. That was until around two, when I grabbed my things from the Coffee Palace, and got on a tram to Flinders Street Station.
I must confess that I did not pay for my ticket on the tram. I didn't have any coins, and no one had any change. I shamelessly stayed on the tram till I reached my destination, and gleefully had my head out the window the entire way. I'm such a tourist.


So I got on a train, and after 59minutes arrived in Upper Ferntree Gully. Wendy drove to meet me, and after an excited hug we got back to her place in Rowville. Met the dogs, five-month William (named after my great uncle Ted) and two-year Tess (short for Tigress). They're a bundle of energy, so we just dumped my stuff and took them on a quick trot around a nearby track to get them to expel some excitement.


Wendy and I then went to a nearby shopping complex to pick up some chicken nuggets and some potato Smileys (!!!), coco pops, choco milk, and of course some Pony biscuits. I now have six stickers out of thirty :D Exciting times for Merlin.


We got fish and chips for dinner, and just caught up about how we each were and what we'd been doing since we last saw each other. Wendy has been to the UK twice - once by herself when she was sixteen, and another with her step-sister when she was a bit older. The first time she visited, I was five years old. That's kind of trippy, if you think about it. I think she was around twenty the second time, which would make me around nine. I was a teeny-tiny itty-bitty twurlin-Merlin.


Wendy is as awesome as I remember, if not more. She's cuddly and just lovely, and I remember holding her in a sort of role-model, idol kind of regard when I was younger. I guess I still do, because if I can become half the person she is, I shall consider myself to be an incredibly lucky girl.


On Saturday I slept in. Wendy and Geoff went to help a friend of theirs to move house, and then went to a house auction of a friend of theirs, so I had theirs to myself. Slept till about ten, then after a bowl of coco pops and choco milk took the dogs around the track. Came back and watched Ella Enchanted, which I now know to be a silly but fun film, and learnt some stuff on the ukulele via the internet. Had lunch, and then watched Stardust, one of my favouritist films ever. 


It was a very chilled out day. My cousins Rob and Rory came over for a bbq in the evening. Rob is Wendy's dad, and Rory is her brother. I'd not met Rory before but he's very nice, and we had long nerdy chats about comics and stuff so that was good. Rob had come over in the summer of last year, so I had already met him.
I tried pear cider at the bbq and found it was alright. A bit odd, but okay. Still haven't found anything that compares to my Schnapps and lemonade. Well, I don't think there's much in this world that can compare. It's Archer's, after all.


Sunday, Wendy and I drove up to visit my great aunt Winnie. My grandad's brother was her husband, which is how we are related. Winnie is Rob's mother and Wendy's grandmother, and that's how we're all tied in. She's absolutely great - the life and soul of the party. You can say something, and then she'll remember a song with that line in and will start singing away. She's not got any teeth either, and makes incredibly amusing faces as a result. She was saying how her philosophy is to always look at the brighter side of life, and to be happy no matter what comes your way. 
It's something we could all do with trying.


Wendy dropped me off at Rob's place, and we went for a bit of a drive around the area. He showed me where he volunteered at a radio station (he's a presenter with his own show) and we recorded a promo of me saying Hi! This is Merlin from Colchester, and you're listening to Yarra Valley FM 99.1 so that will be played on the air occasionally, which is very cool. It's helping me on my way to world domination ;)


We went for a drive around the Dandenong mountains, a very picturesque drive. Great views out over parts of Victoria. 
Mountains are nice and all, but not tremendously my scene when we're in a car. I didn't get out to take a look, because I could see from inside the car. It was pretty, but a view is a view.


We got back to Rob's place, and he went and had a kip. I lost myself on some ukulele sites online, and spent a happy hour or so learning stuff by LIGHTS and even a Florence song (only for you, Bestie). I can also do the Axel F song. Older people will know it as the theme from Beverly Hills Cop, whilst us young'uns will know it as Crazy Frog. Either way, it's still pretty damn cool. And I'm still working on the My Little Pony theme, which is coming along quite nicely.


We went and had pizza for dinner, and I got in Rob's good books by observing that the place was happy to sponsor local clubs and activities. By suggesting that they sponsor the radio station, Rob will love me for the rest of my days. Clever Merlin ;)


I watched the end of Lilo and Stitch, and then we watched New Girl. After that it was the recent Clash of the Titans, with Sam Worthington (the guy from Avatar). Twas very good, as I'm a big Greek myth fan. I got very excited when the original mechanical owl from Athena in the original movie made a cameo appearance. I'm a nerd like that.


I kipped on the couch that night, and tried to calm myself when I woke to the sound of Rob hoovering up a huntsman spider. They're great big things that aren't dangerous, but look like they should be. Thankfully he got rid of it, but it's scary that we have to check his car when we go out to make sure one isn't going to drop onto our heads whilst we're plodding along. 


So we've now moved on to Monday. Rob and I headed to Healesville Sanctuary, which is home to Australian animals and reptiles. So naturally, there were kangaroos, koalas, echidnas, wombats, dingos and tazmanian devils. Oh, and I saw my first ever real-live platypus! They are amazing. So weird and fascinating - they've literally got a duck's bill on their face. They're right out of the dinosaur period, in regards to fashion. Webbed feet, a duck's bill, and a beaver's tail. God was definitely high when he created them, and I think that's absolutely fantastic :D They also are one of only two animals in the entire world that lay eggs but feed milk to their young. I think that's how it goes, anyway.
So naturally, I bought some platypus earrings in the shop when we left. It seemed like the right thing to do.


We got back from the Sanctuary at around four, after stopping for some excellent chips on the way back. Rob mooched around on the computer, and I found Gnomeo and Juliet on TV and put that on. It was very good - a bit too much emphasis on Elton John, but good none the less. I did think that Gnomeo's voice sounded very rehearsed at times, but it was an enjoyable film.
I then had the difficult task of choosing a film to watch. Rob's house is like a branch of HMV. It's full to the brim with records, cds, dvds and videos. Literally. There is a room which has bookcases lining all four walls, each stacked alphabetically with DVDs, and even then there are sacks on the floor. There's more DVDs you could ever watch in a lifetime in that room. There's another room full of videos, and another full of records. There are also a bazillion CD stands, all full of old-school music, and about seven guitars.
Rob is what we call a hoarder.


Eventually I picked out Lord of the Rings. I've never seen it, but have fun playing the games where you kill everything in sight. Quinn and I used to play it on the GameCube and have races to see who could kill more orcs. Fun times.
It was a good film, and the effects were good, but I wasn't tremendously fussed by it. Frodo annoys me no-end, and so do his little furry Hobbit friends. I mean what kind of pillock lights a fire at night when you're being hunted down for agents of pure Evil? 
I guess what I mean is my life hasn't been changed now that I've seen it.


Tuesday we went up the Dandenongs again, but this time not through forest-y bits, but towards little towns. We stopped in a village called Emerald, and I had a mocha and a muffin at a little coffee shop. We met two holiday makers there, from Hampshire. Seriously, the amount of people I've met from England is just stupid. I mean, the guy that did my tattoo was from Suffolk of all places, and studied and worked in Colchester. There I am getting my foot stabbed and he says 'So do you miss the Hole in the Wall?' which was trippy. It really is a small world.


Anyway, after the coffee we went and got an ice-cream each, and then I went to board a Steam train called Puffing Billy. The track runs through the mountains, giving great views over Melbourne. And I know I said a view is a view when it comes to mountains, but being on a steam train makes it infinitely better. All the bouncing as the wheels go over the track, the wind in your face, the smell of the steam coming from the engine... there's nothing quite like it. I sat on the window ledge and had my legs dangling off the side the entire way, and I can't begin to tell you how much I enjoyed it. I'm such a gangly thing that occasionally tall plants on the grass verges caressed my feet as we chugged past. It was such good fun.
Even the conductor was from Manchester. He'd been in Melbourne for forty years, and now that he was retired he volunteered on the train. That is a retirement plan I could definitely look forward to. I had a nice chat with him about England and what my plans were, and he was very impressed :) He even gave me a student-priced fare instead of an adult one, which saved me around $6. He was a lovely chap.


The train pulled into Belgrave, where I met up with Rob again. I bought some post cards and went and got another mocha at a cafe, and wrote about my train-trip. It was very good for me, and I had a brilliant time.


I'd finished my stay with Rob, and he dropped me back at Wendy's house that arvo (afternoon). Said hello to the dogs again, and Will was incredibly excited that he kept jumping up. Unfortunately, he tore the earring from my ear and ate it.
...
Well I didn't know what the Hell to do. I stood there flapping around for a few minutes, before I gathered myself together and called Wendy, who after laughing at me called her vet. Because the earring was so small it wont affect the dog, which is what was worrying me. He'll just get it out of his system eu de naturale. But I shan't ever be wearing that earring again, which is a shame because they were beautiful, and a Christmas present from my parents.


Wendy came home from work at around five, and we had a laugh about Will. Geoff was working that evening, which sucked because it was Valentines day. So Wendy and I decided to go out to the cinema instead. I wrote a quick CV on the computer to hand in at a fast-food place called Grilled, which Wendy said employed loads of people on a temporary basis, which would be perfect for me.
We saw The Vow, with Channing Tatum and the girl from the Notebook. It was a good film, sad in places and amusing in others. It meant something to Wendy, who actually knows a couple that happened to. It's so unfortunate and cruel that you don't actually think of these things happening to people in real life, despite the fact that the Vow was based on true events.


 Well, there we go. Everything that happened until Tuesday the 14th, Valentines day. I'll try and be better next week and have it up on Tuesday again. My apologies that it was late.